If you read my last blog post, you probably learned quite a bit about me. I revealed some of my deepest, darkest truths to the world wide web as part of a program I was completing back in May. And I’ve been pretty quiet here since then. But it’s not out of shame or embarrassment. The truth is that I’ve been insanely busy with some amazing changes in my life that all began when I finished the Landmark Forum and came back to Pittsburgh.

When I went to Los Angeles in early spring, my life here at home was in shambles. I had just lost a successful business I’d spent three years pouring my blood, sweat and tears into. My relationship ended abruptly, and in a very toxic way. I felt lost. I was alone, a single mom with no sustainable source of income and no idea where to go from there. So I boarded a plane to LA to get away and gain some clarity. My lifelong friend, Matt, had insisted I enroll in the Landmark Forum, a “self-help” seminar of which I had no knowledge about. I’ve always been invested in self growth and introspection and his passion and push for me to complete this program left me little excuse to decline.

The three (very long) days I spent doing the Forum were truly the most transformative of my life. When I gave birth to my son, I became a mother and I suddenly knew unconditional love for another. When I completed the Landmark Forum, I became free and I suddenly knew unconditional love for myself, and for all others. It was THAT powerful.

Life after Landmark has been a whirlwind, but I wanted to take some time to share with you what that’s been like. As a blogger, I always feel compelled to let you into my world. But truthfully, the point of this post is to share with you what is possible for you, through Landmark. Allow me to say, as a side note, that I am in no way affiliated with Landmark Worldwide. I simply want to pay it forward by sharing my experience.

Now, the good stuff!

As part of the course, I was encouraged to write letters and make phone calls to people I had wronged, or who had wronged me, as part of a self-liberation process from any guilt or resentment that might be holding me back from success, healthy relationships and really in any area of my life. This part of the Forum was challenging, but I welcomed the opportunity to free myself of the baggage I’d been dragging around for thirty-some years. I knew that, despite the outcome of those calls and letters, I’d be coming home to the same life in disarray, of which I had no idea how to rebuild. But I was returning with a newfound freedom; freedom from self-limitation, freedom from the guise of victimhood and freedom from fear.

As I stepped off of the plane in Pittsburgh, I was keenly aware of the absence of a fear that had come to dictate my existence. I knew that only possibility existed beyond those doors. I was ready for it, whatever it was.

I had two major goals for myself post-Landmark. The first was to do everything in my power to rebuild the relationship I had so intently destroyed prior. I knew that repairing the damage would not be easy, that it would take time, patience, determination and forgiveness. But I refused to believe that it was impossible. I only saw what was POSSIBLE. Pursuing this goal was one of the most difficult things I’ve done in my life. It demanded that I remain outside of the meanings I was inclined to attach to everything that was said, or unsaid, done or undone. It demanded that I see the man that I love for who he really is, and not for the ways in which he responded to the unraveling of our relationship. It demanded that I forgive myself, and him over and over again, for our insecurities and fears and flaws. It demanded that I remain focused solely on the possibility of something new. And, in the end, through God’s grace and through the freedom and clarity I gained through the Landmark Forum, victory was ours. Mine, and his. And God’s. We are now happier and healthier than ever, and have a completely different relationship. And guess what? He decided to do the Forum as well!

It wasn’t just that relationship that was healed, though. Virtually every relationship in my life improved because I had learned how to separate people from their actions, and separate people’s actions from the meanings we attach to them. I was able to see people for who they truly are, behind the walls and beneath the scars. I was able to be my true self as well.

My second goal, after returning home, was to move forward with my professional life. After losing my business, I was terrified to pour my heart into something else and fail. I felt inadequate, and doomed to failure. I found excuses to stay where I was, afraid to take that risk again. But after Landmark, I knew what I wanted to do. And I knew what I needed to do to get there. So I got to work. I’ve been quiet here, but behind the screen, I’ve been insanely busy working on an entirely new business that I am so excited about. I’ve partnered with a great friend of mine to bring something unique and fresh to Pittsburgh’s dating scene! And after months of research, hard work and all of the chaos that a start-up brings, we are just two weeks away from opening our doors. My goal is to build this company to become a staple in Pittsburgh, helping people find love, and eventually head back to Los Angeles to start building there as well.

I’ve also been working behind the scenes on a strategy to develop my personal brand and focus on finding my direction there. I’m excited to be offering life and business coaching both in-office and virtually. You can find more info under the Coaching tab!

In the meantime, I’ve been trying to spend as much quality time with my son as possible during the warm, summer months and before he heads back to school and the new company launches. I’m heading back to LA in October to do the next course in the Landmark curriculum. I’m also doing Landmark seminar series here in Pittsburgh that starts next week.

Only three months after my experience with Landmark, life looks completely different. The impossible became possible, and the possible became reality. I have some big goals I’m still working on, but I have total confidence in my ability to make them happen. Until then, I’m enjoying the ride and all I’ve been blessed with.

For more information on the Landmark Forum, visit http://www.landmarkworldwide.com

*I’ve even taken the liberty of listing my ideas in order of least to most expensive. But read all the way through….she’s worth it.

1. Wine. $-$$ Almost every woman loves wine. It’s delicious, calming, aphrodesiac….you get where I’m going with this. You can’t go wrong with wine, unless she’s a recovering alcoholic or refrains from alcohol for some other reason. Choose a bottle of wine you know she loves, or take a wild guess. Even better, gift her a membership to a wine club and let the wine flow year round!
2. Unique Gifts. $-$$ When it comes to gift giving, ladies like one-of-a-kind. We want something that shows you thought outside of the box and considered our unique tastes and interests. Does your girlfriend like gardening? Gift her a set of feminine garden gloves like these.  Does your partner enjoy beauty products? Try a Birchbox subscription. Is she into arts & crafts? Check out this DIY Lip Balm kit! Does your woman love to accessorize? How about a piece of handmade custom jewelry like this beaded tassel necklace?  Is your girl a candle lover? Check out these customizable handmade soy candles! Choosing a unique gift can get pricey, but it really doesn’t have to. Think about what your special someone likes and take advantage of the world wide web.
3. Practical Gifts. $-$$$ Your woman works hard, year round, to contribute to the finances, maintain a neat and welcoming home, chase after kids and pets. It might be that all she really needs is some R&R! Maybe a gift certificate to her favorite yoga studio would help lighten her burden, financially and emotionally. Perhaps a cleaning service for the house (I know I would be over the moon excited for this one.) Don’t have a lot of extra cash? Make her a handmade book filled with coupons for a night off from doing dishes or an entire meal cooked for her! Another great idea….have her car detailed. Women tend to have messy cars, and not a whole lot of motivation to get on our hands and knees to clean them out. Again, you can do this yourself if you’re on a tight budget. Don’t be afraid to get her something she could really use, if it will make her life easier or more comfortable. Just don’t buy her a vaccum!
4. The Creative Date. $$-$$$ Is your girl more of the quality time over gift-giving type? Try speaking her love language this year and giving her an evening of uninterrupted time with you. Get creative. Is there a new restaurant in town she’s been mentioning? Or maybe a small theatre in your neighborhood is playing old romantic movies? Perhaps a pottery-making experience where you can role-play the famous scene from Ghost. Even a museum or an historic tour of your nearest city may charm her. Does she work long hours on her feet? A couples massage may be just what you need! Think movie romance, but keep her unique interests in mind.
5. The Trip. $$$-$$$$ I know, I know. Unless you’re a true Romeo, or you’re planning to propose, you probably haven’t considered taking her on a trip. But imagine her excitement if you told her to pack a bag because you were taking her away for a surprise getaway! Trust me, guys. THIS is the way to sweep her off her feet and reward her for all she does for you the whole year through. This one will cost you a bit more, but it doesn’t have to break the bank. You can find cheap rooms at bed & breakfasts or private cabins on websites like AirBNB or VRBO. Just be sure to pack the essentials, like bubble bath, massage oils, candles & wine!

Of course, you can always resort to the traditional candies and flowers. But I promise you, if you put a little effort in, you and your special someone will enjoy a blissful Valentine’s Day that will carry over into the rest of the year. Enjoy!

When I first began my journey into health and fitness, I heard a lot of hoopla about having to cut alcohol out my diet. Of course, I was incredibly turned off by this fear mongering and immediately began to panic. I love wine. I drink a glass almost nightly, and on the weekends I prefer to have several….bottles. Just kidding. Unless it’s a really wild night.

The idea of being on an alcohol restriction made me feel like I was doomed to failure. Not because I have an alcohol dependency, and not because I couldn’t give it up. I refrained from alcohol throughout 10 months of pregnancy (Yes, 10 months. I was pregnant forever.) My fear of failure came from the overwhelmth (that’s probably not a word) of having to change my entire life all at once! I knew how difficult it was going to be to get myself into a habit of working out everyday. I knew that it was going to be near-impossible to stay on track with my nutrition. But I was ready to give 100% to that change. But giving up wine? I didn’t sign up for that and I didn’t want to do it. It was just too much change at once. I mean, who the heck likes change anyway? Plus, there’s plenty of evidence floating around indicating that wine might actually help you maintain good health. Why give it up?

So I did what any thirty-something woman would do and I just said no….to giving up wine.

7 months and 43 bottles later, I am down 23 pounds and counting. I am comfortable with my body and enjoy working out. I eat healthy most of the time, and I still enjoy my wine whenever I want. Sure, maybe I would’ve had quicker results without the wine. Or, maybe I would’ve given up altogether. The point is, you don’t have to give up wine to lose weight. I am living proof.

That being said, I have put together a little list of wines and what their general caloric counts are, so you can choose your wine wisely. I’ve also included a few of my personal recommendations. Cheers!

White & Blush Wines

White Zinfandel is your absolute best option when counting calories. This wine has only around 105 calories per 5 ounces. However, a lot of wine drinkers don’t care for a White Zin, myself included. Your next best option would be a Chardonnay or Chablis, which are at the low end of the spectrum at around 118 calories per 5 ounces.

I drink Chardonnay frequently and one of my favorites is the Sofia Chardonnay produced by the Francis Ford Coppola Winery.

This wine has a delicious hint of apple and spices, which is perfect for the fall, but enjoyable any time of year. I highly recommend trying this one, multiple times.

Sèmillon, Sauvignon Blanc and Fume Blanc each have around 122 calories per serving. Dry Riesling, Pinot Gris and Pinot Grigio average about 123 calories.

One of my absolute favorite wines is the Kris Pinot Grigio created in the Kris winery in Italy’s Alto Adige region. This wine has the perfect amount of subtle sweetness and goes well with almost any food!

A sweet Riesling, which can have as many as 225 calories in each 5 ounce serving, is not a great choice for drinking regularly. However, should you choose to indulge in a sweeter wine from time to time, you MUST try this one!

Eroica Riesling is produced in the Chateau St. Michelle winery in Washington state in conjunction with a German producer of fine Rieslings. I had the privilege of touring the facility during the early stages of the development of this wine and was also able to sample it. It was truly love at first taste, and this is one sweet wine I do allow myself to enjoy on occasion.

Red Wines

As for red wines, the concept is the same. Dry reds yield lower caloric counts, while sweeter reds will be higher in calories. I personally don’t drink much red wine, but I like to know my options and I’m guessing you do as well.

Pinot Noir and Grenache (or Garnacha) contain approximately 122 calories per 5 ounce serving. Syrah and Hermitage have around 123. Cabernet Sauvignon, Bordeaux and Merlot typically have about 125 calories per serving.

Chianti has around 128 calories in each serving. When I do drink red wine, I prefer Chianti because it’s relatively mild. The Banfi Chianti Classico Riserva is an excellent choice and is very affordable.

Now this isn’t a green light to start drinking excessive amounts of wine. As with anything else, moderation is key! If you’re as much of a wine lover as I am, check out this wine club for home delivery service of AMAZING specialty wines! You can even earn FREE wine by referring friends!

When I made the switch to a Paleo diet, the transition came with quite a bit of unexpected awkwardness. I began my wellness journey right before Thanksgiving and soon realized that the holiday season would bring the worst of it. Having to prepare all of my own food, declining the meals lovingly prepared by holiday hosts felt rude to me. I was sure that I was hurting feelings, and that my choices were coming across as pompous or fussy. I hated that, but it was a necessary part of my recovery.

Turning down cookies and pies  and handmade pierogie weren’t the only source of discomfort for me, though. The actual gifts I received my first Christmas since beginning this diet, however thoughtful, were a reminder of how dispiriting that holiday season was for me. My mom bought me some baking items; a rolling pin, measuring cups and spoons. They were beautiful, not your average baking items. The rolling pin was marble. The cups and spoons were a beautiful, hand-painted porcelain. They were a wonderful addition to any kitchen. Except, of course, a kitchen where there were no flours, no sugars, no eggs. The gifts were lovely, but they were a painful reminder of all I’d given up. It would be a long time, if ever, that I’d be able to use them.

It’s been three years since I began treating my Lupus with nutrition, but the holidays continue to be a challenge. I still have to make a lot of my own food, but I’ve been able to navigate some pretty amazing gluten-free/paleo alternatives to help me recreate the magic of the season. But the gift thing can still get tricky. I’ve received things like cookie mixes, pizza stones, etc that I can’t really use. I simply smile, say thank you and find a space in my tiny kitchen for these items to collect dust. Someone asked me last week if I’d like a toaster oven, to which I awkwardly responded “I can’t really eat any foods that could be toasted.” It inspired me to create this gift-giving guide for your gluten free friends and family members.

I don’t mean to come across as ungrateful. The truth is, I’d be happy with no gifts at all. Christmas, for me, has always been about spending time with loved ones and celebrating Christ. My siblings and I are rarely all together, and when we are, its gift enough. But people do feel compelled to buy presents for one another at Christmastime. And I hope that this will help to give you some ideas for the gluten free guys and gals in your circle.

Gifts to Avoid

1. Any food items that are not certified gluten free. Depending on the severity of the gluten allergy or intolerance, cross contamination can be a big deal. If you’re purchasing any food items, be sure to check the labels! If you want to make a gluten free treat for someone, please be extremely cautious of cross-contamination. Clean surfaces before preparing and be sure that no gluten-containing items are nearby.
2. Any kitchen item that a person with gluten-sensitivity will likely not be able to use. Examples: Toaster Oven, Pizza Stone, Waffle Iron, Bakeware, etc.
3. Gift Cards to restaurants that don’t offer gluten-free friendly options. If you’re unsure, call the restaurant to be safe!
4. Cookbooks that don’t include gluten-free recipes.
5. Beer, unless it’s gluten free!

Gifts to Get

1. Gluten Free Baked Goods from your local GF bakery or from Etsy! Try these!
2. Coffees, Teas or Gift Cards for either.
3. Meat & Cheese basket.
4. Fruit Arrangement.
5. Cookware.
6. Sangria Set.
7. Moscow Mule Mugs.
8. Wine.
9. Gluten Free Beer.
10. A CSA subscription! Find one close to you here.
11. A cute tee to support your gluten-free friend or family member. I love this!

A little thoughtfulness goes a long way. Be kind. Be merry.